Taking a page from The Tonight Show’s Jimmy Fallon, Dave Cortese and Sam Liccardo faced off in a lip sync battle at the annual political sketch fest Monday Night Live, proving the San Jose mayor’s race has “all the charisma of a potato,” as one attendee quipped. Cortese went with Frank Sinatra’s “High Hopes,” which even papa Dom Cortese thought was dated, while Liccardo whooped it up to Dionne Warwick’s “Do You Know the Way to San Jose” and smacked himself in the face with his jacket while doing the helicopter. But not every politico fell flat. County supervisor Cindy Chavez was a natural as host for the event, deadpanning that if she ever became mayor, every week would feature a Labor Day holiday. San Jose Councilman and male model Don Rocha joined her as a special guest, and the two proved to have natural chemistry as she told him it takes “more than just a nice ass” to last on the Board of Supervisors. “I see your point,” Rocha said, taking a measured handful of his own tuchus. Lame ducks Xavier Campos and Pete Constant donned “Duck Dynasty” beards to poke fun at their impending departures from the council—and Liccardo’s preferred spandex bike shorts—while developers Tom Armstrong, Ray Hashimoto and Michael Van Every joked that the city’s soon-to-be departing council members are in their crosshairs. The (fading?) power couple of Neil Struthers, formerly a building trades council boss, and an actress playing his wife, State Assemblywoman Nora Campos, also took the stage in a skit that featured the Stage Company’s Bonnie & Clyde actors giving the lowdown on what the couple was really thinking behind their typically manicured answers. Proving humor needs a dose of truth, Bonnie noted that Nora “burns through staffers like (planning director Joseph) Horwedel burns through reefer.” Fly will have to get back to readers on just how much pot Horwedel smokes.