Incumbent Pyle Confident She Can Beat the Biostatic Noggin
With just nine months until primary elections in San Jose, speculation in south San Jose’s council race has already turned wacky. Baseball Hall-of-Famer Ted Williams’s son says that his dad’s severed and cryogenically frozen head will be running against Nancy Pyle as a registered Separatist in District 10 in the June primary.
“My dad has made the selfless and bodyless decision to throw his head into the ring and vie for the District 10 seat occupied by Ms. Pyle,” said son, John Henry. Mr. Henry says he will orchestrate several appearances for his dad’s melon in the next few weeks in preparation for his official announcement, but warns against the expectation of much comment.
The former Red Sox slugger’s head was severed from its body in a procedure at Alcor Cryonics Laboratory in Arizona and submerged in a liquid nitrogen-filled, silver lobster pot and frozen in 2002 where it remains at minus 320 degrees Fahrenheit on a shelf next to office cleaning supplies.
Political analysts all agree that it will be a very interesting race, and even though Mr. Williams can’t speak, or think for that matter, his fame and name recognition should fare well in a district that elected Nancy Pyle.
The South Bay Labor Council, who supported Councilmember Pyle in her first election, has already funded an independent expenditure in the form of a hit piece on the Red Sox star claiming that there were several unauthorized holes drilled in the star’s brain and the skull has been severely cracked during extreme temperature fluctuations at the facility. “We just want to point out that we don’t think he is playing with all his marbles,” said labor chief Phaedra Ellis-Lamkin.
Terry Christensen, chair emeritus of the political science department at SJSU, says that while seeking political office by a lifeless and frozen head is strange, it is not unprecedented. “Forrest did it twice here in San Jose,” he pointed out.