Ferrets Join South Bay Labor Council

Partnership Could Give Legal Status to Thousands of Mustelids

In an unlikely partnership that has Ferrets Anonymous members grasping victory from the jaws of defeat, the South Bay Labor Council and the illegal ferret group have joined forces, setting a precedent that has other lobbying organizations redefining what it means to recruit.

The plan to make millions of undomesticated polecats union members comes on the heels of tough setbacks for both humans and animals: the Labor Council lost significant political influence with the recent council elections and the ferrets were recently placed below only Ron Gonzales and Brittany Spears as insignificant parts of our society.

“My hat’s off to them,” exclaimed Terry Christensen, chairman of the political think tank at SJSU.  “Just when you think the Labor Council has been beaten, they pull off a coup.”

Pending legal approval from the Santa Clara County Department of Animal Control, the furry beasts would be given union cards allowing them to work, precinct walk and ultimately achieve their goal of becoming house pets.

Other lobbying organizations have followed suit.  Silicon Valley Advisors, Saggau and DeRollo, and Strangis Properties have all applied for several hundred H1-B permits to recruit martens, badgers and minks respectively.

“Don’t underestimate the intelligence of these animals,” said labor leader Phaedra Ellis-Lamkins. “They’ve been running the Mexican Heritage Plaza for years now.”

Experts predict that with the addition of the abundant ferret population in the valley, the South Bay Labor Council will again wield control in city politics in the next election cycle.

“The nice thing about these critters is that they can be controlled if neutered,” said an animal control specialist who quickly added, “The ferrets, not the Labor Council.”

29 Comments

  1. You’re dead meat, Jay-Mac4—you have insulted the entire ferret population by claiming that they are the incompetents running the Blanca Memorial Plaza.

    Head Ferret Aviles was quoted in the Murky News yesterday as follows:” We want to create a partnership with the city.”  Clever, that ferret.  She declined to finish the sentence by saying, “and the city’s job in our new partnership is to provide ALL the money, since our impotent board (guess they did neuter the ferrets) combined can’t raise as much money for a not for profit as PierLuigi Oliverio.”

    In a city with a large Mexican population, there is little interest in the Mexican Heritage Plaza.  Were they told it houses the South Bay HQ of La Migra, or something?

  2. #1 – Obviously, you don’t know either man you are talking about. Using Les White’s name in the same sentence as Borgsdorf (or Bergsdorff, to use your misspelling) shows you know little about either guy. Borgsdorf was an unethical yes-man whose only job was to do the mayor’s (Gonzales) bidding—even when he knew it was wrong. White has unimpeachable ethics and knows his job is to do what is best for the entire city, not just the elected officials.
    I don’t know the details about this specific issue (stadium) any more than you do, but I do know I would trust White any day over Borgsdorf.

  3. Supervisor Charges Profiling

    San Jose (FFN)—In just the latest profiling scandal to hit local government, County Supervisor Blanca Alvarado has accused the Department of Animal Control of rounding-up ferrets in numbers disproportionate to their representation in the latest population survey. According to a fact sheet prepared by the supervisor herself, in just the past five months the estimated number of ferrets seized was listed as, “lots.”

    “This discrimination has been going on too long,” charged Alvarado, a legendary local political figure renown for her Mexican ancestry and unique ability to spot the Virgin’s image in baked casseroles. Reading a prepared statement at a press conference held at the Mexican Heritage Plaza, the supervisor, though frequently distracted, pledged to her constituents that this injustice would be tolerated no longer.

    “It is time to put our law enforcement officials on notice that they can no longer conceal their prejudices behind code words such as “legal and illegal,” pledged the supervisor, who went on to say, “What this community wants from its law enforcement is for them to do what we tell them to do, when we tell them to do it.”

    Ms. Alvarado then introduced to the reporters Retreado Ramirez, a local tire shop operator who recently witnessed what he described as the brutal capture of a ferret in his neighborhood.

    “The white lady,” he said, referring to the unnamed Animal Control officer, “she drove right past a white poodle to get to the poor ferret. But I ran up and told her, ‘Why? What are you doing? That ferret has babies!’ But she wouldn’t even talk to me. And now I don’t know what’s going to happen to the baby ferrets.”

    As reporters began to question Mr. Ramirez, Supervisor Alvarado interrupted the proceedings to demand that Plaza staff stop moving furniture around and interrupting the press conference.

    “Oh, I’m sorry Ma’am, responded one of the workers. But we don’t work for the Plaza. We’re from Office Broker—we’re here to repossess the furniture. But I promise we’ll work as quietly as we can. By the way, how much longer are you going to need that podium?”

  4. Edna –

    I totally agree with your comments about White vs Borgsdorf.  I know Les White and Les White is no Del Borgsdorf. Equating White with Borgsdorf is like equating Walter Cronkite with Bill O’Reilly.

  5. #3
    “In a city with a large Mexican population, there is little interest in the Mexican Heritage Plaza”  You make a valid point.  As an early Californio descendant, I ask myself why.  The Hispanic community had a wonderful chance to utilize a great historical-cultural resource, the Peralta Adobe, when it was restored by the City.  Rather than make the City’s #1 landmark the centerpiece of early Hispanic culture in San Jose,  a few outspoken individuals chose to make a big issue about the restoration of the Fallon House.  Though plenty of important facts regarding the unfair treatment of Hispanics from the 1840s-1990’s needed to be aired, an opportunity was missed.  Few built on the valuable contributions early Californios made to San Jose’s community.  The City should have looked at the lack of interest by the local Hispanic community to take “ownership” of the Peralta Adobe before they invested millions of dollars into The Mexican Heritage Plaza.  Perhaps we all should learn from history.  Buildings are not as important to San Jose Hispanics, as they are to other cultures.  Peralta was a very wealthy man with over a dozen children living with him.  Yet he chose to live in a one bedroom home with a loft.  Californios enjoyed entertaining outdoors in San Jose’s beautiful weather.  Recently we learned that Cesar Chavez’s family demolished his San Jose landmark home years ago.  It is clear that San Jose’s hispanic families have always loved parks, parades and other outdoor events.  The City would have better served that community, had they invested in parks rather than the Plaza.

  6. Les White might be more ethical than Borgsdorf but…it was Les White who sent out emails throughout the city spilling the beans on a confidential investigation of a city contractor by the Grand Jury

  7. So Les White hides a document about Wolff’s plan for the new Spartan Stadium???

    Reed claims to operare in Sunshine and he is backing the City Manager’s determination that a public document should be held in secret.

    Don Kassing, who has never supported the public’s right to know is hiding under his desk during these discussions?

    Reed and White are no better than Gonzales and Bergsdorff.

    Strike that, White is a bigger liar.

  8. JMcH IV,

    With all the good things there is to write about San Jose, I’m surprised your dad let you write something so tacky. This is as bad as inviting people to visit Boston to hang out with all the potato picking drunks.

  9. #11 Native San Josean and your point is??? 

    It seems that Les is a very intelligent man and did not want appear to cover up anything like ol’ Ronnie Dis’ Honor.

    The people of the city of San Jose and it’s employees have a right to know what is going on with tax $$$$$‘s. 

    If “CONTRACTORS” to the City are screwing up and wasting money, they deserve to be investigated, i.e. NorCal…  Team San Jose and so on. 

    Oh, by the way Grand Jury Investigations are not confidential.  Please educate yourself.

  10. Frank is a decent guy who wants the facts no matter who is involved.  He wants to be fair and he wants the public to know what is going on.

    What is shame about Dave and the rest of his smelly friends is that they think Chuck is above any law, and that Les can keep secrets no matter what.

    San Jose Inside has really become the Reedite News.

  11. John Michael,
      Glad your back.At times you insult our passion for the least capable of us, yet you never fail to inspire me to blog my thoughts.
      I was miles out at sea today and happened to read the Mercury News during a break in the Salmon fishing. An article by Fernando Zuezata,. called for subsudies by the City. I almost dropped my hot wings. No mention of ganas.
      Fernando, Able Cota, Victor Garza, Marge Gaeta, etc, etc. These were all people that were members of the G.I. Forum. Mayor Reed wants to know where’s the mula. All were in some way connected to the politics of the Mexican Heritage Corp and with the exception of Able Cota who was made consultant to the Mariachi Festival, were members of the MHC Board. Throw in a Pete Carrillo , Sandra Escobar and there was the makings of the folks at the Mexican Heritage Plaza.
      The board did not find Pete. I recollect that one day he just showed up like a new puppy. Now who has that kind of juice to make that happen? When he was finished with that job, Ron Gonzales had a special event at city council as a fair well tribute to Pete, very touching!
      With out going into much detail, I will only say this to you unnamed bloggers and faithful reader.
      The GI Forum for several years had 3 cash rich Cows. The Cinco de Mayo, 16 de Septiembre, and oh my gosh, the Mariachi Festival, what a coincidence.Who has the juice to make that happen? Lots of cash!!!
      I’ll close with these thoughts. Marcela, Dan Fenton, and a few new board members must invite board members that will cultivate a new community based support network.
      I’m asking the members of the old board once again to step aside and allow room for new members.
      Keep in mind that for years there were no audits. when I asked for them, out I went with the kick in the butt, by Fernando and company. My best coup ever. A month before ground breaking.
      I asked the board to resign and make room for new member that could raise the funds for our new Plaza. Get otta here!
      The Plaza is an important venue. Just a few years ago San Jose did not even have a place for it’s Mexican History.
      Thanks to Joe Hernandez and our Garden Mayor Tom McEnery we now have a place to call home.
        As a Founding Director of the Mexican Heritage Corp, and The Mariachi Festival, I was delighted to attend this past Mariachi Festival. The net profit was $200,000.00. You didn’t have to ask where that money is.
      Mayor Reed, Give Maricel and Dan the opportunity to make good on the good work I and others did many years ago. Demand that the new board actively take part in fund raising.
      You might even concider allowing the Mexican Heritage Corp to take over the Cinco de Mayo and the 16 de Septiembre. Less the GI Forum influence.
        I could see the debt retired and the international good will catapult us into the one of the Great Villages of our nation.
       
    Gil Hernandez,
    Founding Director MHC & International Mariachi Festival.

  12. #9

    Just Google past finfan writings on SJI.  He is insulting to Hispanics every chance he gets.

    For whatever reason, he hates Blanca, who just happens to be one of the more thoughtful county supervisors.  He even had SJI declare a post of his about Blanca as being racially offensive, and they removed it.  Personally, I think SJI needs to be chastised for that move, but its their site.

  13. A great double whammy For Easter Sunday.

    “Ferrets”, used in Europe to drive out rats and rabbits from their burrows.
                    College Dictionary
                             
                                  D.O.A.

  14. Gil:

    It’s abundantly clear that the MHC ferret board is blatantly incapable of performing the most important function of a not for profit board—raising $$.

    But those ferrets are connected, and like to see their pictures in the paper and onTV, and they give themselves awards frequently, with the dinners usually @ The Fairmont.

  15. #25 Johnmicheal O’conner,
      Probably about the time you discovered Pinot Noir. And Zuezueta discovered politics, You Cracker!
                The Village Black Smith

  16. The Salmon Fishing is always Great! All the fish and the fleet were just North of Monterery. Lots of fish caught. The trollers were into the action. Get out there and enjoy.
      Nice fish too! Tight Lines!!
                      The Village Black Smith

  17. #27 John, tostadas, brea and Pinot Noir don’t work well together, and that junk happens to be a working replacement heating coil for the steam room, and that sixpack of Billy Beer well where else can a guy keep that safely. Thanks for covering for me.
                            Gil

  18. Good Lord.  This idiotic posting doesn’t even make sense.  How old is this clown?  Is everyone with the last name of McEnery a complete moron?

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